success

i've marched for a cause and i walked in nature, i also got to capture some really great shots and i'm almost done with my film. i take so long getting through a whole roll it's ridiculous. but i actually feel really good with myself and the way things are going (:

lone

i feeel so lonely on days like these, i cant express my feelings and feel cnfortable doing it. i miss i miss i miss. but i look forward because i know things will fall into place, thats a given. i have to look up to the brightness and see what will be in a couple of hours, maybe days. i know, im glad, im happy, i am full when that moment comes. and that moment will come soon, i know it (:

photo

i really do wish i wasn't so agitated with my mother when i was getting ready to go to my daddy's house yesterday. i am watching these, somewhat documentaries, of underground photographers. i was so caught up in being so upset and irritable i didn't grab my camera and i really meant to ): i also didn't grab some other things that i meant to. this just goes to show NOT to get all upset over stupid little things my mother throws at me. i was upset because she wanted me to drive to micky dees to get her food, and i totally boycotted that place, and she brought the three dogs in my CLEAN heep(jeep), my pet peeve is DIRTY CARS, and she complained the whole way over there and was telling me how to drive and turn and she made me go through the drive through which i also hate. buuuuut blah blah that's so pointless getting so mad that i got yesterday. i just really wish that i grabbed my camera because i am so inspired to do something with it. I'm glad that i grabbed some of my art supplies so i can let some of this inspiration on some sort of something. haha. i also let it out culinary too when my grandparents go out to dinner with the rest of my family for their fifty-sixth marriage anniversary, which is beautiful.

so i really hope that whoevers' little eyes are reading this has a really wonderful day and that you get things done! haha i mean it

light

i am making a video to get people aware of the suffering of others in third world countries. maybe it will enlighten an invidiual's mind and help these beautiful people out. or just have them aware so their a bit unconfortable, or along the lines. i dont know what im doing or how good it will turn out.




(this is just a note, kind of like a post-it (: )

desire

I'd like to write to you but no words come to mind. i want to tell you something beautiful but nothing is configuring.
oooooh, I'll tell you what i want
i want to travel to places, beautiful places; city, country, ocean, and other places along the line. i want me new camera lenses. i want/NEED new clothing and i will always. i want my own actual car. i want friends who have my sense of humor. i want an income. i want to move from this town because there is just dust here. i want to get far away from my mother because all she brings in unnecessary stress in my life and happens to be the biggest annoyances. i want to be finished with school already. i want to teach little children. i want i want i want, i need i need i need.
i know that in the future, and near future, that all of these will come true and i will be happier then ever and i will experience these "wants" with great people along the way.
i really do miss someone right at the very moment, and every other moment not spend with him <3
for the person viewing their little eyes upon this, i hope everything is doing well with you and if it is not, i am almost positive that things will start going your way. i wish for all best for you in the present and especially in your future. so with that, have a good day, night, morning, afternoon,...LIFE!

rain

twisted day, emotionally and physically. i was good in the morning and so was the weather. later progression into third period i was heartbroken, we watched invisible children and even though i have seen it before i was still upset. and the weather got windy(no big surprise in the AV). then the day seemed to drag on after that. the clouds started rolling in and now it just started down pouring. my spirit was broken i didn't feel like anything good about 30 minutes ago. i am now just trying to catch up and this song, bill withers-lean on me, is kind of cheering me back up again which i am glad for.
here is another thought in my mind, actually this is just free association, i am ever so happy really, even though i had a bad day i am good there is nothing majorly wrong. im embracing this rain because i know this weekend and i get to wash my jeep(one of my pet peeves are dirty car and my heeep is diiirtay). Easter, family, birth of spring. the weather is getting warmer which means i can start shedding clothes and getting fit(nooo bootay shorts or skimpy dresses though. i will be becoming a senior, my man is moving forward positively, i will be turning 17 in the summer, i will be able to drive people legally soon! and me and Tarryn are doing summer yoga classes! there is so much more too look forward to and if i am in a bad mood or i just feel completely sorrow for myself i know i can think of my future, and also i know things could be a lot worse.
i dont ever mean to drag on things but i have found that if i write i feel like i am releasing some things that dont need to be bottled up inside me. a quote from the song im listening to right now! "and we'll all float on okay all right all ready we'll all float on, all right dont worry we'll all float on even if things get heavy we'll all float on." you betchaa! i will take a nice hot shower and steam off some of this "bad" feeling. i dont know what to call it.
you are a beautiful person and i admire you for being so, believe me, you are one of a kind <3

grace

hello there you beautiful face
not only are you beautiful on the outside but you are a devine soul
if i could swim out of my body to be embroided by yours i would
if the sun would set the way your lips set over mine then world would be a better place
i want to tell you something but there is no way the words would flow smoothly out of my mouth
the only person who has made me so bright is standing right in front of me and i am speechless
this road has had it's bumps where i dont know where i was
but i knew that the road would hit it's pace where you left me off
by now you should understand that there is no limit to the love i offer you
your words send tingles down my spine and how i adore that
i know by know that i will never give this up because i know by know this is worth it completely.




i think that this has been one of the most beautfulest(i dont that sounds right) day so far this year, maybe. everytime i have thought today i was enlightened by that bright thought of(daa diiing) haha. ooooohhhh i cant wait for the future :D

nuuuuuthargic

so while i am here ramshacking thoughts my mind
i opened a memory i once let behind
i let that joyful scene play through my head
the way you moved in closer to my heart made me tingle all over
while i sit and think of you my feelings are aware
i wouldnt know what to do if you were not there
closing my eyes i let all these memories intertwine
the feelings inside get deeper and deeper




aaaagh i was bored (:
i love you